The Number One Question.
One thing that we are often asked at many different times in many different ways is “…what happened to Jessica?” Well it all began as a mystery which started on a frosty Halloween night in 1978.
I had taken the kids that night and my wife Renée had gone to church, since she had a choir practice. She had taken two month old Jessica with her, while I took our older kids, Jamie who was 10 and Jon age 7, out ‘trick or treating,’ and then home to bed since the next day was a school day. It seemed like a normal crisp fall day, but this day for us… would be like no other.
Later that evening when Renée came home, I remember going out to the car to carry Jessica into the house, and the first thing Renée said to me with a slight tremor in her voice was, “Something is wrong with Jessica…” as her voice trailed off in the dark, I could see the look of alarm on her face and small tears in her eyes.
I quickly looked at Jessica. She was sleeping like an angel, nothing seemed amiss.
“What do you mean? What’s wrong?” I said, feeling completely puzzled.
What I didn’t realize at that moment was the now obvious fact that we had just passed a crossroads and were unexpectedly on our way to a strange new world.
The Undiscovered Land.
We would soon find our family immersed without warning, into the ‘land of broken toys,’ kicking and screaming as we went. It was bewildering. There were very few places to turn for help and advice back then, and as inexperienced, non-professionals, dealing with this new ‘special world,’ we were unprepared. Looking back now, I can see the motivation forming that 25 years later compelled me to become an author of books about our journey. I was to become a ‘reluctant author.’
We have come to call it ‘Adventures in Jessica-land.’ It is a land of many wonders. Precious moments mixed with heart throbbing terrors, but certainly not boring. It requires some ‘growing up.’
I am speaking to you now from that once undiscovered land, as a full time resident.
Maybe you are there also as a caregiver or caregiver supporter. Maybe you have entered suddenly or slowly as the result of a loved one’s affliction, creating a need for caregiving. In any case here we are. Now what?
Why Am I Writing to You?
As I said earlier I am a ‘reluctant author.’ As the years rolled by we found our way. We have learned how to survive and thrive as full time caregivers for Jessica, and finally are seeing the blessing in parenting a ‘special needs child’ who is now a ‘special needs adult.’
We are not in this for the fame or fortune. Renée and I and Jessica are sharing our story and the lessons we have learned, to make the path easier for others. We don’t consider ourselves better or smarter, but we do have a lot of experience. Someone said that experience is what we learn from making mistakes. Well we have made a lot of mistakes and we have learned a lot of lessons.
If we can help you or your loved ones by baring our soul and sharing our hearts then we will gladly do that. That is our only motivation.
This is the title of my first book. I created it after much pressure and prodding by my wife, friends and distinguished writing professionals, who kept encouraging me to tell the remarkable and moving story of my baby girl Jessica’s life experiences.
‘Growing Up with Jessica: A True Story,’ was warmly received and has won multiple author awards. I just released the 10th Anniversary edition of the book on October 31, 2015. A significant date in our family history.
My second book, ‘Lessons from Jessica: Ultimate Caregiving’ Was released on October 8, 2015, the celebration of ‘Children’s Day.’
A third book in the series will be released in 2016.
Our many experiences in ‘Jessica-land’ is the very real catalyst in our continuing spiritual and emotional growth. We have traveled from despair to surviving and thriving, and embracing the privilege we have in the care and nurturing of another human soul as ‘Ultimate Caregivers’ for little Jessica.
The Rest of the Story:
I will continue to share the answers to the question “What happened to Jessica?” every Monday in the weeks ahead. When I have received sufficient feedback and questions, I will add a Thursday episode as needed, to this blog focused on answering your questions and comments.
Thanks for your interest.
Jim, Renee & Jessica
