My Moment of Truth.

My Moment of Truth.

LFJ1_P039.410.15_lores“Listen to me Doctor…”

I had blocked the only exit from the room, our faces were inches apart, our eyes locked. My frustration welled up from my heart. I began to speak.

“Listen to me doctor, we are not panicky parents! As you know, we have two other children. We have seen a lot, and been through sickness with them, and I am telling you, there is something terribly wrong… with Jessica!” In my mind I flinched at those words.

I had finally said it. My heart dropped to my feet.

“You were not there,” I doggedly continued. “…you did not see what I just saw. It was not pretty. It was the worst thing I have ever seen!”

Doctors & Plumbers.

Looking back now I should have asked for a second opinion. I should have asked for that at the very beginning. When we first spotted the trouble. When we first began to keep our log. We were concerned, but trusted too much the doctor’s advice about Jessica’s strange behavior.

Some old wise-guy once said, “…doctors are like plumbers, some are artists and do great work, others, well… their pipes leak.”  Wise advice.

Somethings can not be undone. You can not ‘un-ring the bell,’ but you will be living with the consequences. Maybe for the rest of your life. My advice to you. Don’t hesitate to get a second or third opinion when you are concerned about your life or the life of some helpless person under your care. You are responsible, not the doctor. They will not come out to your house for the rest of your life and help you. You are on your own. Be careful and choose wisely.

The Mystery Begins…

I passionately continued, “I don’t have a word to describe it. I don’t know what it is, but… there is something very wrong with this kid!” The pain I was feeling in my heart at that statement, was unbearable. I waited in silence for a reply from the doctor, who stood frozen in his tracks, his hand still reaching for the door.

The doctor stepped back. He was watching my face carefully. A sigh, a shrug and then with a condescending tone to his voice he said, “Okay. Okay,” he sighed, “The only thing we can do is to send Jessica to a specialist, you know… a neurologist.” A neurologist? I turned that over in my mind. That was a brain doctor. Was he saying that Jessica’s brain was damaged in some way? A sobering thought.

“We probably won’t find anything, but if it will make you feel better, I will schedule it.” Rubbing his eyes absentmindedly, he went on, “Realize that the Boise Neuro Clinic has a huge backlog of cases. You will probably have to wait at least 3 to 6 months.”

“I don’t care how long it takes or who we have to see, just make the call.” I said.

Next Week: “We Will Never Give Up…”

I will continue to share the answers to the question “What happened to Jessica?” every Monday in the weeks ahead. When I have received sufficient feedback and questions, I will add a Thursday episode, as needed, to this blog, focused on answering your questions and comments.

Thanks for your interest.

Jim, Renee & Jessica

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